Seriously Sacred

It's been a good long while since I shared pictures. So, I'm sharing the ones we got for the grandparents this year.

My big 4 year old, Corban:



My sweet 2 year old, Brennan:



My amazing 9 year old, Cara:



My beautiful 11 year old, Sienna (love this picture! My friend Dana did some work on it, I Heart Faces style! You should check her out, she can fix your photos, too. It's her business and she's good at it!):


The little love, Keaton, at 6 weeks:



The whole fam damily:



Photos by Robin.

3 Months Migraine Free!!!

Which means, of course, that Keaton is 3 months old already. LOL He's such a sweet baby.. Once we got his dietary issues worked out he became the best baby, I swear. (No, he doesn't sleep through the night but he only wakes twice so I'll take it!) He's a smiley happy baby about 95% of the time. Unless,of course, mommy is not around - then it upsets him greatly. At his last check up (a month ago) he was 12 lbs 8 oz (nearly double the weight he was when we brought him home). Boy loves to eat! He's got congenital tortecollis so we have to do icky stretches and his head always sits to the side - but we're working on it!

My life is better because he's in it!







Oh, and he LOVES his siblings. :-)

Seriously Secret

No, I'm not pregnant again. (Yet! HA! LOL) It's just been awhile since we opened the floor up for you guys to spew forth your thoughts. So, here it is - your forum. Get it off your chest NOW so you don't explode later. ;-)

Got a rant? Want to sing someone's praises? Need to share a secret that you're DYING to tell? This is for you, then.

Sometimes we all need to blow off some steam. We have something we just NEED to get off of our chests but we can't say it in certain company. You know - people you KNOW read your blog or it's something you just can't say IRL to anyone. Well, say it here, now. Say it under your own name or anonymously. Spill your secret, sing some praises or rant your rant. You can even post anonymously!

Ready? Go!

Helpful Hint from heidi

No matter HOW tired you are, it is IMPERATIVE that you put the lid onto the percolating coffee pot before you attempt to brew coffee. Otherwise you just have a big mess and no coffee.

You're welcome.

For other little pearls of wisdom, click here.

Boob Tube Holder

I hate our entertainment center. It's not disgusting or anything but it just holds too much crap. Isn't that funny? We're always looking for things to hold stuff and for storage and here I am complaining that it holds too much stuff. The problem is that, because it holds so much stuff, there's always a ton of junk on it. Movies EVERYWHERE and it becomes a place for people to set things and then just leave them there. No matter how I clean or rearrange it, it still looks messy. Drives me batty!

I was looking for a new tv stand and decided that I don't want to give up storage, entirely, even though I like things like this:



I know there's a little storage underneath but I think, ultimately, I'd really prefer a armoire type of tv stand.

Like this:



Then I can just close the doors on any clutter and no one even has to know it's there!

What kind of tv stand do you have? What do you recommend??

Look! A Vlog!

Wow. That's a fantastic still frame shot. Just gorgeous! Ignore the background "music". Jeepers! It looked like I was tossin my kid around like a doll! I swear I wasn't. I sat him up on the table, that's all.

Seriously Profane

It's been awhile since I've shared any Seriously Profane or Seriously Sacred things....but this one just needs to be shared.

This past weekend Rob and I found ourselves (found? Try carefully orchestrated!) with just the baby in our care. We finished up our Christmas shopping and decided to go eat somewhere that didn't put a prize in it's kids meals. We were checking out some places online, trying to determine where to go. I have special dietary issues (blah blah blah) so we can't just go eat wherever we want. Rob suggested Perkins and we were off to see if there was something there I could eat.

While on Perkins site, Rob saw the Nutritional Calculator off to the side and decided to plug in his stand-by dish to see what was what. That man is hereby FORBIDDEN from ordering that thing more than once a year. (Listen, I would prefer he NEVER ordered it again but I know him and he will.)

The description from the Perkins site for Homestyle Pot Roast:

Oven-roasted and served with grilled onions, green peas and rich brown gravy.

Seems innocuous enough, no? No. It's not. It's a coronary bypass in disguise.



Do you see what I see? 2090 mg of sodium? In ONE meal?! Look at that saturated fat! And the cholesterol!!!!! I mean, really!!!!

Oh, but wait...that's NOTHING. Check this bad boy out...



Oh yeah. I'll have the Butterball Turkey and Dressing with a side of high blood pressure and a heart attack for dessert please.

HOLY CRAP!

Prefer the Pot Pie? You might want to go ahead and order a casket on the side.



Maybe you should play it safe and just order a salad? Honey Mustard Chicken Crunch Salad:




Ugh. Perkins is ....

Helpful Hint from heidi

There I was, popping popcorn on Saturday night for the kids and I. It was popping up nicely at a good pace and I was shaking the pan for maximum pop. It got full and I removed it from the heat and prepared to pour it in the bowl. That's when it happened. It was horrible and terrible and painful.

I took the lid off the pan.

I turned the pan to pour the popcorn.

And a rogue kernel popped OUT of the pan....

and DOWN my shirt.

Not just down my shirt but down into my bra where it wedged itself.

I dropped the pan into the bowl and yelped! "HOT! HOT" HOT" OUCH! Oh $#!t!"

I lifted my shirt and my bra and the kernel, fresh from the hot oil of a pan, fell to the floor.

With tears in my eyes and help the affected area gently and inspected the damage. That damn kernel did some damage! It was stuck in my bra, against my skin for nearly 30 seconds and managed to burn through several layers of skin!!! And, as something burns and smolders it spreads, so I have a burn mark twice the size of a popcorn kernel on the inside of my right boob. I'd show you, but this isn't that kind of blog, yo.

The moral of the story? Put your cleavage away when popping popcorn - and watch out for those rouge kernels.

Another Helpful Hint from heidi.

I have a Theory...

I've often wondered what happens to make kids go from the age where they believe what we say with unquestioning trust to never believing any word that ever passes our lips. How does that happen? How do I go from being all knowing and wonderful to being a moron that knows nothing? It's so confusing.

Today I came up with a theory. Hear me out here...

As a baby when you burp you're congratulated for the sound that comes out of you. *BELCH* Oh, goooood boy! Nice burp! Thank you! We giggle and laugh when they fart so loud the walls shake. The older they get, the less cute it becomes. Stop burping at the table, son. Don't fart in front of people, dear. That's gross. Might wanna check your underwear after that one.

Kids perspective: Wait...so it was cute when I had no control over it and now that I do it's gross? But now I can do it on command so you can laugh more often! Why isn't it funny anymore?

When our kids are little we tell them to say 'Hi' to the strange lady and to shake hands with the man they've never met. If they shy away we tell them not to be rude and then we cluck at the stranger and try and hide our embarassment at the complete lack of social skills our prodigy possesses. Then, as they get older, we drill into their heads that they should NEVER talk to a stranger.

Kids perspective: Wait..so which is it? I'm naughty for being rude and not talking to the stranger or I should NEVER talk to strangers? Pick one already! I want that candy that man is holding out the car window and I don't wanna be rude!

We tell them about Santa, the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny. We play these things up with great pomp and circumstance! Santa is coming! The Tooth Fairy brought you FIVE DOLLARS! Oh, look what the Easter Bunny brought! All the while we tell them that it is, without a doubt, wrong to lie. They should never, ever, ever, ever, ever tell a lie. Liars suck. No one likes liars. Then they find out Santa and his posse are all made up. That they were *gasp* lied to.

Kids perspective: Wait..so which is it? You can lie but I can't? Lying is bad? Lying is ok as long as it's fun?

No wonder they reach a certain age where nothing we say can possibly be true. I'm not even sure *I* believe me anymore!

False Advertising!

I was watching 'Don't Forget The Lyrics' (which I could TOTALLY win) with a bunch of kids when a Kay Jewelers commercial came on. Have you seen it? Super freaking Cheesy. It's the one where there's a storm and then there's lightening *crash* and thunder *boom* and the poor scared woman turns to her lover and hides her poor little face. He says, like a big strong man, "Don't worry, I'm right here....and I always will be." Bahahahahaha!! Seriously? Ok, anyway...that's not even the point. The point is, we all sang the jingle...you know how it goes, you sang it already, didn't you? Every Kiss begins with 'Kay'. La la la. NOW you sang it, right? Ok. Good.

So I said - "Well, at least they got something right - every kiss DOES begin with the letter K." And that's when it happened. I got schooled by 11 and 12 year olds.

"No it doesn't," Sis said. "What about 'smooch'? That's a kiss that doesn't start with 'k'."

"What about peck?" asked another 11 year old girl.

"Yeah!" said a 12 year old boy. "And French Kiss doesn't either..it starts with F. So does.."

NO! No it doesn't. We're done with the 'F's, young Jedi. Wax on, Wax off. Move it along. Even though I have NO idea what he was going to say, definitively - I can only imagine.

In conclusion, (Really? Conclusion? Have I even made any points or sense at ALL here?)we call foul. Every Kiss does NOT begin with 'Kay'.

Oh. Here's that cheesy commercial if you want to see it.